In the Onania Masturbator Forum, a Masturbator Wrote:
I am in a push/pull relationship with porn. And with my pornosexuality. I keep trying to (perhaps stupidly..) deny that I am hopelessly addicted, hopelessly dependent on for the depths of gorgeous pleasure we masturbators seek! Keep trying to resist looking at porn and so in turn resist being “tempted” to compulsively jerk off to it… for sometimes up to a week, maybe 2. My highest is 17 or 19 days. Whatever day my resolve crumbled my memory was hazy immediately (forgetting how long I had nofap for!)
Are you a porn addict?
Then what happens is I and my brain comes flooding back to my porn use Mmmm And the crushingly beautiful relapse hits me so hard I nearly cry <3 Ngggh I will leak after 10 mins of light rubbing and stroking as I ease into the DEEP stimulating pleasure. The dopamine flood/rush!! Today I am relapsing. I have the house to myself for another 7 more hours!! I missed having porn to comfort me and my existence this past 6 days Ngggh I missed the addict stroking to porn goddesses. I missed feeling weak and empowered at the same time. I missed being vulnerable and dependent on images to achieve a throbbing erection.
Yet how much I miss it there is so much humiliation to finally admitting who I am. What I am. What I love calling myself… I am a pornosexual xxx
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