Hello fellow self pleasurers,
I am new to the Forum, but NOT new to Onania (love reading the stories and experiences). I have been a reader and secret fapper for many years. In some ways, I have to thank? Richard for taking me so much deeper into my masturbation addiction. For me, it was the discovery of the Peter files. I saw my own psyche so clearly in those stories. My personal favs were Judy’s Jewels (my first and soo powerful was his need for Judy and his helplessness against her wishes and her cavalier regard for his small but cherished dangly bits) and The Diary where the Head Mistress punishes the errant young boy in such a delicious fashion.
As for real life, I have sadly been pussy free for many years due to a surgery my wife had, but over the last 3 or 4 years, I have started to care much less about it and have slid into what could only be accurately described as chronic masturbation and porn addiction. Between being cuckolded/cheated on in my first marriage to being locked out of sex effectively in my second marriage, masturbation has been my only “go to” for coping, comfort, and enjoyment.
My porn interests are sph, cucking, and a nice nurturing but humiliating mindfuck. I do enjoy video but that is a very small sliver of what is out there. I started on tumblr and have migrated to bdsmlr.com after tumblr was censored. I love pics of beautiful sexy women and I especially enjoy a good headfuck via caption accompanying a pic. Over time, the humiliation factor is probably my biggest trigger. I very much enjoy a lot of edging. If I’m not careful, I call way too often into NiteFlirt and I have a select few operators that are very intelligent and understand psychology sufficiently to be GREAT mind fuckers. I love to relive my past cuck days with today’s perspective. When I was actually experiencing these things I was very inexperienced and since it was in the early 80s (I’m older), I thought I was a total degenerate/pervert for some of the things I was thinking and feeling. I had no idea what a cuck was or why I began to actually eroticize my shame and humiliation.
Ok, sorry if that was too deep, but that’s my intro. I hope to exchange thoughts and graduate from lurker to contributor.
Again, many thanks (and curses) to Richard for his wonderfully wicked Peter Files that were my initial and enduring trigger.
I hope everyone is doing ok in these Covid times. It has really knocked the shit out of my ability to masturbate and I long for my edging days to return (I’m a closet wanker and my wife would be disgusted/horrified).
Thanks,
Source: (52) lilgoon intro – hi all! – Onania Masturbator Forum