by Pixie MuleDonkey » Sat Feb 04, 2017 1:22 pm
i should have known, since i discovered at summer camp that the things i fantasized about were different than the things normal boys fantasized about (we were in the showers, crushing on the same girl, but while he talked about wanting to fuck her in the swimming pool, i talked about wanting to wear her onepiece swimsuit). i should have realized it when i started masturbating in my freshman year and immediately became an addict. i should have realized it when my friends and i would discover a teen sex comedy movie on TV, but i would be the only one who immediately had to sneak off to the bathroom to masturbate while thinking about what i’d seen.No, it was when my Dream Tomboy romantically rejected me, citing my outrageous masturbatory excesses as the main reason she could never get together with me, that i began to realize i would forever be a pathetic masturbator. i only had a few romantic relationships since then, and eventually lost my virginity, but in every relationship it was a countdown until i confessed my deep, overriding need to masturbate at least three times a day. i finally decided to throw out all of my boy underwear and wear only panties, beginning to embrace my sissyhood. i think it was then that i finally accepted that i would always be a sissy beta sufferer of PMS.When i discovered Richard’s “The Peter Files” erotica online, it was like a sign, a Bat-signal for chronic masturbators. i always hoped i would someday communicate with him because those stories were one of the first times i realized that other people had the same thoughts and feelings and struggles with masturbation as i did, fetishizing the shame surrounding the act of “self-abuse” and getting off on the thought of social humiliation due to the embarrassing habit and weak-willed submission to the masturbatory urge.And now, here we all are, like-minded stroke-addicts and fingerfuckers in our own little community of pathetic losers, in a world of humiliation and jerk-off encouragement videos and erotica. We should have seen this coming. It was always our fate, masturbators.