…The first process urged me towards greater sexual gratification and the easiest way to do that was through porn. The second process then kicked in and made me feel ashamed of viewing the porn. The first process retaliated by increasing my desires, driving me back to the ‘net and escalating from soft porn to hardcore. The second process responded by heaping greater shame and self-disgust upon me. This Catch-22 spiralled with ever-increasing intensity until it took over my life. Both processes were simply doing what they were programmed to do. This was a cycle without end – until, as already related in this series, I realised that unconditional acceptance of my sexual self was the key. This disempowered the negative process, allowing me to disengage from the Catch-22. And because I was then free to allow sexual joy into my actual life, the need for the porn substitute subsided…..