. masturbation is an indispensable part of your life; you can’t even
remember living without it.
. it is your primary mode of sexual expression. Whenever (or if ever) you
have other forms of sex you feel something is missing.
. you are spending more and more time masturbating, but it’s still not
. you stop wearing clothes when you are at home.
. you have an assortment of different lubes, to suit your varying moods.
. the number of masturbation toys you own exceeds your lifetime count of sex
. you have to buy a larger hard disk for your downloaded porn collection.
. you throw away your porn collection in order to break your habit, and next
day start a new collection.
. you skip work, leave parties early, excuse yourself from seeing friends in
order to masturbate.
. you wake up and decide not to masturbate today, and then twelve hours
later realize you’ve been masturbating the entire day non-stop.
. when you are not actually masturbating, you are still thinking about it.
. you plan special masturbation sessions days in advance and look forward to
. your masturbation sessions extend over multiple days.
. you miss sleep and meals in order to masturbate more.
. your erotic fantasies are all about masturbating, not having sex.
. the hand becomes a sex object.
. you begin fucking couches, chairs, walls, floors, pillows, doors, and
anything that doesn’t move or cause electric shock.
. you get an erection at the grocery store in the melon department.
. you get an erection at the drugstore in the hand lotion / baby oil aisles.
. you no longer blush when you hand the check-out girl your jar of Albolene.
. your local drugstore special orders Albolene for you in bulk.
. you do stupid and risky things in public.
. you finally admit it and recognize that you are addicted!
Can anyone add more?