Technorati Tags: Chronic Masturbation,Masturbation Addiction,Compulsive Masturbation,Guided Masturbation,Onania
Some chronic masturbators said:
… i don’t think one can necessarily assign specifics between what is chronic and what is not. as Jeff () mentioned in a reply post, the time one spends in bate is unimportant and insignificant to defining one as a chronic bator. there are miriads of subtleties in bate that vary from man to man and even for myself, from session to session. for me, i define myself as a chronic bator because i am a man who is more oriented and obsessed with masturbation than what i am with “other” sexualities and interests.
usually i would much rather masturbate than fuck/suck. i’m often even disappointed when i sometimes meet someone with the intention of indulging in mutual masturbation and the other person wants to move beyond mutual bate and include “other” sexual activities. when i stated in a post that i believe that many men think they are chronic but they really are not i was referring to men who do enjoy jacking off as opposed to masturbating. to me there is a difference between jacking off and masturbating. jacking off is MUCH more casual and carefree than masturbation. masturbation, especially chronic masturbation requires much more of a committment and dedication. chronic masturbation is a much more infinite driving desire than jacking off. one can jack off a dozen or more times a day and still not be a chronic masturbator. jack offs vs. chronic masturbators — jack offs do it because they’re horny and because it’s fun. often they would much rather be engaging in some “other” sexual activity. chronic masturbators do it because they NEED to, because they WANT to, because they LOVE to masturbate. chronic masturbators often go thru a lot of trouble to make sure that they get to indulge their bate frequently. chronic bate is what you bring to your bate. it has deep rooted intensity that jacking off does not have. chronic masturbation is a love for masturbation in it’s own right, other sexual interests be damned. when i masturbate i love to sink it really deep and allow myself to become totally immersed in and consumed by bate, mind body and soul. also, another factor for me is that i do NOT bate just because it makes my cock feel so awesomely incredible. i bate because i LOVE to bate. i LOVE the act itself. i LOVE the obscenity and yes, even the apparant peversity (as others might view it anyway) of my bate. another member recently posted that he sometimes begins a bate even when he’s not feeling particularly horny. i do that quite often too. because i know that once i’m into it i’m gonna totally love it. and man, do i ever.
as for calling myself a batorsexual instead of a chronic masturbator — i am both of these by the way — “batorsexual” is just a term i came up with one day that i felt immediately comfortable with and that i feel more accurately defines my personal sexuality. hell, the word batorsexual even turns me on…lol. i think the word batorsexual defines my sexuality as masturbation oriented in much the same way as heterosexual defines a straight orientation and homsexual defines a gay orientation and bisexual defines sexual interests in both males and females and “other”sexual defines whatever their prefixes imply. also, batorsexaul fits me better than solosexual because i love to indulge in masturbation sex with other male masturbators as opposed to strictly doing it only solo. i believe two or more men can indulge in masturbatory sex with each other without it particularly being a homosexual or gay act. others will disagree. they will see any sexual interaction between two or more men as homosexual. but for me, i can easily separate masturbatory “batorsex” from “homosex”.
in closing i’d like to note here that i will continue to use the terms “jack off”, “jerk off”, “wank”, etc.. i use those terms out of convenience and yes, i might use those times also to entice more eroticism. all the while though i am Rob, i am batorsexual!
stroke on…..mmmmm yeah!!!!!
Rob
Yet the idea of a man not simply jacking off or simply masturbating to planned stimuli is what separates the Masterbaturs from men who do it because it’s “what men do.” My favorite edge time is when I get up nude with my sleep boner, drink my first cup of coffee and read the paper.
For me, real bliss is when you’re naked and just want to make your your dick and yourself feel good. Fantasy has always been important for me and at 44 it’s all good. Like all men, I also enjoy visual masturbation stimuli, such as magazines and movies. I would call myself a batorsexual because it’s all about how a man is with himself. A man can sink deep into the spirit of masturbation and it is a true blessing.
guys, i recieved the quoted text below from a member thru the Yahoo IM in response to my previous post regarding my batorsexual interests. i was originally going to answer the member back by email but decided to post it here on the group instead because i thought more of you might enjoy reading my response and perhaps some of you would identify with it as well. and so here it is.
“I enjoyed reading your most recent post at __. The way I understand what you’re saying, the “batorsex” part of your identity comes from the fact that, even when you’re having sex with others, masturbation is far and away your favorite part of that sexual activity. And the gay part of your identity comes from the fact that when you have bator sex with other people, you prefer that your bate partners be male rather than female. Do I read you right?”
to try to answer you…
i have ALWAYS been batorsexual. i’ve always preferred masturbation over ANY other sexual interest/activity. now having said that i guess i should explain that i have never had any interest whatsoever in female sexuality. so for my part anyway, any discussion of my sexual interests in females is now closed.
as for the gay part of my identity, let me try to give you an explanation. i find males infinitely sexually interesting. what turns me on most about males though is masturbation rather than any of their “other” sexual interests and activities. i think that a man is never more sexy than when he is engaged in masturbation. for me, seeing a man masturbate or being with a man when he is masturbating is the sexiest thing on the planet. i LOVE observing a man turning his significant sexual lusts in upon himself in acts of masturbation rather than in other “more conventional” sexual acts. to me, masturbation is THE most personal and intimate sexual act there is. and all the infinite subtleties of a man in bate turn me on SOOOOO much more than any other sexuality.
i believe that most men (if not ALL men) probably masturbate much more over the course of their lifetimes than what they engage in other sexual activities. thus an obvious conclusion keeps me preoccupied. i see masturbation as the “root” sexuality of men. other sexual interests that men come to have owe their beginnings to masturbation. since masturbation is the “root” sexuality i see it as a much more powerful sexual source than other sexualities. for one thing, i think that no matter what else a man may get into sexually, he will almost undoubtedly return to masturbation again and again and again.
i think that i developed my gay interests in my younger years as a by-product of my masturbation orientation and interests. i have in the past been much more interested in gay sex than what i am nowadays. i do still enjoy gay sex from time to time. i even desire it from time to time. but my masturbation desires far outweigh my gay desires. my gay interestes developed because being “gay” with other men was the closest i could come to interacting with other men in a masturbatory way than being straight. over the years all the while i was interacting with men thru gay sexual acts i was secretly longing for it to be much more masturbatory than gay penetrative and copulative. i wanted, and want still, to see and experience other men indulging in the super deep very personal and intimate masturbation that they probably do only when they are alone. i want them to see and experience me in such a manner as well. i want us to masturbate ourselves in one another’s presence and masturbate one another as well. i want to make out with them, masturbator to masturbator. i want to masturbate with them cock to cock. i want to experience the other man’s personal and intimate sexual interests and practices in himself and have him experience mine as well. i want each of us to totally and wantonly surrender to masturbation and set our masturbation desires free with each other but keep the sexuality between us more or less totally masturbatory and not gay sexually penetrative.
i have been fortunate enough to experience this intense and intimate male to male sexuality with a few men in my past and hope to experience it many more times in my future. i would even prefer to experience it this way with MANY more men in my future. and if you’re in Houston, TX, get in touch with me and let’s do this. i NEED it…lol. as for the “other” sexual interests of the men in my past that i have had these experiences with, some have been straight, some gay, some bi. it matters not to me. i also feel like men can relate in these ways to one another and it is totally masturbatory in nature and not particularly a gay thing at all. i’m not so sure i can properly convey it here in writing but i can very distinctly separate male to male masturbatory sexuality from male to male gay sexuality. and male to male masturbatory sexuality is what i call “batorsexuality” and that’s who i am and what i want.
one more thing i’d like to mention here is that there are SOOOOO many men in ___ with whom i would LOVE to masturbate with for real, live and in person. SOOOOO many of you turn me on big time, especially those of you who are so very upfront and “in your face” in regards to your masturbation. if it were only possible i would be bating with a number of you CONSTANTLY. you guys DO feed my bate appetites and desires as you feed and consume on one another’s bate appetites and desires. and for these reasons, HAMMER is a labor of love for me and i thank you for your continuing contributions and participation on the group. i’d also once again like to encourage those of you who have been hanging around quietly in the background to take a step or two out of your bator closet and post some content here. post pics, vids, write in to the message board, whatever else you might wish to do. the more men we have participating here the more it feeds the bate for all of us and i for one am one super ravenous bator…lol. enough writing from me for now. i have to get back to working on my dick.
With apologies upfront for a lengthy post. I’ve been thinking about my reaction to the need for a new term, and gotta weigh in on this a bit.
First, I really do like the notion of batorsexuality, and certainly identify with the points raised. And I’ve grown increasingly reluctant to use solosexual, since fairly often my bate is shared with others, either in person, on the phone, by webcam, or some simultaneous combo. So, no argument with any of that.
My concern (and I detected it in myself first, then thought I saw it between the lines in some of the posts) is that we not discriminate against those who are just starting the journey.
Why is the idea that chronic penis masturbator as a term (and CPM, and edging, and gooning for that matter) is growing more popular and entering common usage … why is that a bad thing? I think it’s great! I look forward to the day that the NY Times uses the term ‘chronic penis masturbation’ because its use has become so widespread and understood that no one can deny its existence. When the word ‘gooning’ appears in Websters dictionary.
A couple years ago, on phonelines like PowerCruise, you heard the word chronic in every 25 messages or so. Now, it’s in every 3rd or 4th … and that’s awesome!
Will that create CPMs who are more wanna-be’s than actual CPMs. Sure. If there’s an 18 year old on the 563 line who identifies himself as chronic cuz he strokes twice a day for 15 minutes each, then I accept him as the chronic masturbator he aspires to be. If he’s “edging” for 15 minutes, and that’s three times longer than he used to do it, I say more power to him. If he can’t pull back from that moment of inevitability at some point, if he goes over that line and hurtles to orgasm … well, that’s not a failure, that’s success. And with more practice, he’ll get better, if that’s what he wants.
So, while I don’t reject the need for new terms, I wouldn’t want to invent them to separate ourselves from others, setting us apart, as though we’re the “real” masturbators and others are just not good enough, establishing some sort of elite club that has some sort of criteria to join.
Sure, there’s a distinction between “jacking off” and “masturbating” … but it’s mostly in the man’s head. When a man celebrates his penis, and claims to be chronic, I say, let’s welcome him into the fraternity.
Can it be abused? Is it a bummer when a guy who says he’s chronic hooks up with you and pops his load after 30 minutes, when you were wanting to go for the long haul? Sure. But there’s plenty of times I’ve hooked up with guys who’ve told me — while they bate solo all the time — this is the first time they’ve bated with a bud since they were in high school or college, and the intensity of the present day experience — 10, 20, or 30 years later – just overwhelms. Yeah, they shot sooner than you wanted. They probably shot sooner than they wanted. But he is is a work-in-progress, a bator in formation. Rather than denigrate him, we should encourage and coach and acknowledge him, not tell him he’s not “good enough” to be a real bator, that he’s not really chronic.
I travel a lot. If I haven’t pre-arranged a meeting with a “true” bator, then I’m often left with CraigsList or gay.com or a visit to the hotel steamroom (all of which work) to find a bud to bate with. One of the great satisfactions of this is introducing (or re-introducing) the idea of the bate to men. I’ll meet a guy in the steam room, get something started. For him, it’s gonna be a quick JO. Instead, I invite him to my room, making it clear it will only be about stroking, no sucking or fucking. It’s amazing the number of men who will join me … the majority, I’d say … in the safe environment of an out-of-town hotel room, away from disapproving family or friends. And while there, we talk about masturbation, and I share how much I love to masturbate for hours at a time, and they are fascinated to hear about it. They reflect how they used to spend more time with their penis, and I encourage them to rediscover their dicks. I tell them about edging. Maybe introduce them to poppers. Do they shoot too soon? Sure they do. But I’ve planted a seed. I know I have. That man will start exploring (or re-exploring) his own bate. And I derive a certain satisfaction from that.
Truth is … I could masturbate with you for four minutes, four hours, or four days. But when you leave, the first thing I’m gonna do is solobate. We can NEVER do it enough as bate-buds that I won’t want to continue the session when you leave. Cuz I’m a self-centered narcissistic masturbator.
Looking back at the bate sessions I’ve shared with men, I marvel because every single one of them has taught me something about the bate. A nuance. An approach. An attitude. A mindset. A variation I’ve not thought of or tried.. One guy gets off on the shame of it, and relishes how dirty he feels. For him, being watched is being “caught.” Another totally revels in the drunken / drugged out / stoned / buzzed / mind-altering aspect. For him, the bliss is a pain-killer, a distraction from daily life. Still another regards it as a spiritual experience, completely present and mindful of every stroke and breath. For him, his penis controls how he relates to the universe.
I tell you, I think I’m pretty fucked up on my penis, that I’m about as chronic as you can get. And then someone comes along and I feel like a novice with so much more to learn. Every time I think I am reaching the end, the limit of the bate … that I can NOT possibly get more chronic, well, something happens and I find that I was no where near the limit … that, in truth, there is no limit to the bate.
So let’s not try to establish some sort of elite tribe. We’re all on a journey here, men. I love you all for your exploration of penis pleasure. If someone else is not as advanced (yet), then help him out.
So, I’ve resolved: any self-identified CPM is chronic in my book. If he’s got a long way to go, then I can show him how to get more self-loving, more excessive. If he’s still performing/showing vs. lost-in-bate, I can share my own toe-curling, tongue-hanging approach … happily, it’s what I want to do anyway.
We can all spread the good news of the bate … be missionaries, as it were. What I most get from this group is the support to push myself ever-deeper into ever-bate (another word I love).
You guys have taught me so much. I’m a better masturbator today than yesterday. Will probably be an even better masturbator tomorrow. One thing’s for sure: I masturbated 30 years ago. I masturbated a year ago today. I masturbated last week. I masturbated yesterday. I will masturbate tomorrow. And next month. And 20 years from now. Sloppy, lubed, blurred fist, intense torture mixed with exquisite pleasure, mouth open/tongue hanging/spit drooling queer-for-my-own-dick masturbation.
It’s a wonder there aren’t more of us … and if we simply share it and be patient, there most assuredly will be, regardless of what term we use to define it …. And if we don’t throw up artificial roadblocks for those who are following us to overcome.
