A masturbator wrote: Giving Up Trying to Quit

In the Onania Masturbator Forum, a Masturbator Wrote:


 

It’s been a while for me, but today I remembered when I stopped trying to quit being a compulsive masturbator. It was so relieving admiting that I am a complete addict, and that I will likely never change. Before that I had always felt a little guilty – I was still binge masturbating (close to what I do now; around 6 hours on weekdays, 10 – 12 on weekends) – but I tried to maintain somewhat of a social life, and would often try to quit, usually just lasting a few days.

The moment of accepting who I am came after my last attempt at quitting. I hadn’t edged that whole work week (Monday through Friday), but as I came home on Friday I passed an adult video store. While I didn’t go in, just thinking about all the wonderful porn and perverts in there got me so hard, I went home and immediately started edging, furiously watching porn on the internet. I edged through the whole weekend, cancelling plans to see friends, totally captive to the BBWs and gangbangs I was watching online. At that moment I accepted who I was. There have only been a handful of days I haven’t edged at least 2 hours since then – and that was about 7 years ago.

Now I am a hermit masturbator, who doesn’t need to worry about my “friends” bothering me because they stopped calling a long time ago. I know I will never have a “normal” family life, or social life, but this is who I am. I am ashamed at what I have turned in to, but that just fuels me. All I want now is more humiliation porn, as I sit in my masturbation cave and edge my life away. I need this so badly…..

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What a wonderful testimonial!

I certainly understand how this addiction cuts into one’s social and family life. As I type this, my wife is in bed frustrated because I don’t fuck her anymore. I just can’t give up the edging and being online. I’ve even begun in the last year to encourage her to step out on me. It hasn’t happened yet, but I am hopeful.

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Gaining access to the net was the turning point for me. I did searches on masturbation and soon discovered some great forums and groups with one of the best being the old CPM group.
Discovering there are many guys who love masturbating at least as much if not more than I do was a huge help in accepting who I am and resulted in raising the pleasure I get from it to a whole new level.

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Fully agree. Finding like minded guys online in groups like this has significantly strengthened my addiction. Being in a community of guys who understand how I can edge in close to all of my free time and still NEED more fuels me. Additionally, all the wonderful porn niches available online (for me cuckold, humiliation, hypnosis, tall amazon women, bbws, gangbangs, among others) keeps me constantly aroused.

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It completely takes control. When I started becoming a hardcore addict around 10 years ago I had a steady gf – although she didn’t state it explicitly, I know she broke up with me because I couldn’t get hard anymore for her.

Since then I have lived alone, in masturbatory bliss, but without a love life or much of a social life (practically none in last 7 years). I go to work and edge. I know I have turned into a hopeless addict who lets masturbation rule my life. I am intensely ashamed of what I have become – I know I am the definition of a jerk off loser – but it turns me on so much. It is a cycle I know I cannot stop

8 thoughts on “A masturbator wrote: Giving Up Trying to Quit

  1. Since finding this site I find myself pleasuring my penis more. It’s reassuring that others find so much Pleasure in stimulating their genitals as well.Its also a major turn on. Let’s Masturbate right now for each other and have a nice Intense Cumm.Pretend we are Masturbating each other right now.We are Masturbators and Proud of it.Don’t you agree?

  2. Palmer, we all develop various strategies for “managing” masturbation in our lives, especially early when we are trying to grow up, marry, start a career. But for many of us, masturbation winds up managing us.

  3. Wow!!..I stumbled upon a whole new world…just out of curiosity I came across this website……ok,where do I start. …I’ll try to make this short and simple as possible…how do I view myself??..I’m a “average ” masturbatory than looks upon EVERY stroke as valuable as gold…I’m 54 and divorced,…for the record, masturbation didn’t contribute towards the divorce,. .on the contrary,..my ex-wife and I had mutual masturbation once in a while…but I had a healthy married sex life for 8 years and afterwards with gfs….the fact that edging was done more since then really gets me to find more time to masturbate…I know that masturbation is normal as long as you can control it…although, I fantasize about being a chronic masturbator I realize that it’s nothing to joke at….I also understand that edging involves high levels of dopamine in the brain and yes I love that high for hours…when I have my masturbation session I use a soft chair, a large body-sized mirror, a (believe it or not….1 or 2 paper towel tubes), lots of tissue paper or paper towels(better absorbing), on occasion, pages from various porn mags, sometimes lube,.and sometimes a really small buttplug,. ..although I am hetero,.I feel like my anus is truly aroused and on fire…I discovered that sometimes I’ve cummed harder and more in volume. ..in short, seeing myself getting an erection to its full 8 1/2 inch length keeps me MORE aroused….I can maintain this for a couple of hours while I take a break standing from time to time. ..I love massaging my balls and stretching the scrotum as possible. ..don’t get me started on my precum!!…I have learned to love my pre love juice….I seem to produce a gallon of this while I edge for hours and hours….hmmm…making me horny thinking about it…anyway,.masturbation edging has given me many happy days..even when I’m not masturbating I think about how many hours I can fit in the day or the following day. …after reading so much on the topic on some websites and reading testimonies from other guys I realize that I’d LOVE to find more time to masturbate and be addicted to it but I know that I control it…I’m divided between wanting to want more and controlling it. ..the part of me that wants to masturbate beyond a session of 4-6 hours to probably 10-12 hours each day for the week…masturbating wears you out but I don’t care (really)…after cumming hours later I’m in a mega happy state afterwards…I do know one thing…masturbation makes life bearable from time to time and I’m guessing (*actually taking a wild stab at psychology)..that masturbating has probably reduce violence and killings for a small percentage world wide as does regular sex…I’m glad that I masturbate 2-3X’s a week. ..I realize that it’s IMPOSSIBLE to masturbate for 24/7/365…the human body isn’t equipped that way….we all have to eat,sleep,and work and those take up a majority of the hours in the day,. ..yeah, I’d love to masturbate and have sex continuously for days on end but it’s physically and timely impossible…enjoy your time you’re masturbating(or having sex)…it’s REALLY worth more than gold!

  4. Gosh, same here over the years I’ve attempted to stop a number of times. But eventually I came to realize — who cares. If its something you enjoy doing – then just do it. Like the huge sign on the wall in the Hustler sex store, It’s Just Sex.

    I don’t spend the entire day doing but do enjoy my morning session, it’s a great way to start the day. With abit of sexual pleasure. And I’m a single stroker so its super easy to do anytime the urge hits.

    I remember when I’d consider to stopping from time to time and end up tossing my lube, ‘zines or vibe into the very upper most part of my closet so it was hard to get to.

  5. In my experience providing masturbation support, I agree that chronic addiction and edging are mostly male behaviors. There are a few chronic females, but most females seem to have a more holistic approach to sex and relationships. Males tend to become addicted to their own hands/penises.

  6. I am a wanker, bisexual , sissy, into humiliation , so I can’t get preachy, but….I got to say….mainly but not exclusively it’s men who tend to be the perverts…
    Personally, being the way I am, I hang with the beauties alot….the tens..the ones only real men get ….but of course as a sissy pal who couldn’t service them properly and doesn’t even want to….
    My point is that I get from their minds a lovely balance on sexuality…and whilst it’s important and affects us all its not the be and end all….perhaps around a third of life depending on the person…so I think being obsessed and edging for hours is pretty weird….I know the beauties agree…what’s wrong with just shooting your load when you need to and getting on with life?
    Hello out there ?
    Am I wrong ?
    I think not…

    Xx nikkip. Xx

  7. It`s arousing for me, reading all the confessions, i agree and i feel encouraged in my masturbator habit. Internet porn has become totally control in my live. I live in expectation of my next porn and edging sessions, now i change to my tumblr blog, posting and stroking and enjoy to collect all the porn-fellow follower ´till i keep my shuddering orgasm…

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